Its my job to scramble the pattern and create new beliefs for my clients, here is how I do it........
All my life I have been
obsessed why people do what they do, one area where people lose out continually
in growth and opportunities in life is through having strong beliefs and
self-limitations, it’s what forms us as human beings,
The beliefs you hold to be true, make up the fabric of your experience. The stronger those beliefs, the more
they seem unshakable, and the more you will find evidence to support them.
What most people don’t realize is that the vast majority of our beliefs about
the world are not really true “out there.” They are
only true because we've decided they are, albeit we likely haven’t done so
consciously.
Beliefs are formed through
repeated thoughts, and the only reason they hold any weight is
because you've decided or agreed that they are true.
There are a lot of
collective limiting beliefs that you've probably agreed to:
· I am
not good enough
· I am
too old to make a go of it
· I could
never work at that level
· I just
cannot seem to reach my best
· Dreams
are just not practical
And there are probably a lot of
personally acquired limiting beliefs you’ve collected
through your own unique experiences. Whatever the case, most beliefs are formed
unconsciously, without our knowing about it. We didn't necessarily decide to
agree to these beliefs because we wanted to. Now
I hear you ask what’s all the different states of consciousness, will remind
you later in the week.
It’s not like one day we woke
up and thought “Man, you know what would be awesome? To go out today and repeat
a bunch of thoughts that are going to turn into hard and fast conclusions that
will keep me from experiencing the life I want. Yeah, I think that’s what I’ll
do today.”
That would obviously be
ridiculous.
None of us want to keep these
beliefs, but we either think:
1. That’s
just the way things are (everyone else agrees), or…
2. It’s
become such a part of my identity that it’s too hard to change now
In order to solve the first
problem, we need to realize that what is often seen as “just the way things
are” is, in reality, just a collective assumption. And because it’s
an assumption, that means that we decided to agree to make that assumption as
well, on some conscious or unconscious level.
In that case, we need to
reclaim our power, and choose to stop agreeing. It can really be
that simple.
When it comes to
ingrained limiting beliefs, patterns, or
habits, these can be a bit harder to change. Because we’re so used to them —
and mostly because we identify with
them — they hold a lot of weight in our experience. It can almost feel as if
they’re immovable objects on our path.
Some common limiting beliefs are…
· The
feeling of not being enough or good enough, question is “How do
you know this”
· The
feeling of not having enough “ what’s enough and how do you know
when you have enough”
· Having
to work hard for money “ what’s working hard to you”
· Not
deserving success “ what’s success to you”
· [insert
your limiting belief here] do you have one we
all do so think about one that limits you, I know with some of my clients it
took them months to work with me, I had a chat with a senior manager of a
business because I was to be silent in our work, the limiting belief was
having a performance coach for him was a limiting belief he was weak and a failure, we changed
that to inspiring a workplace with his example of learning and personal growth.
Beliefs can destroy you, they can cause wars around the world.
These things can seem daunting
to try to change. And even when you do make a real, consistent effort, it is
often just too hard to overcome.
Luckily, there are a few steps
you can follow in order to make the shift to new, more empowering beliefs.
1. Stop
identifying with the belief. Most
beliefs are so difficult to change because we identify with them. They seem to
be ingrained as a part of who we are. And because we identify with them, we
allow ourselves to be defined by them. If you think you’re not creative, you’ll
see yourself as someone who just wasn’t born with that ability. If
you think you’re bad with getting things to work, you might think you’re
just not a mechanical person. It’s easy to get caught up in allowing
our beliefs to define us, but they don’t have to. So the first step is to stop
identifying with or defining yourself based on what you believe.
2. Kill
your conclusions. Whatever you think you know to be certain
is probably a lot more flexible than you think. What you think to be required
is certain to be much more negotiable. Question all of the conclusions you have
about what you think to be true, fixed or possible.
3. Test
your assumptions. Without pushing the boundary and testing your assumptions,
it’s impossible to move past your limiting beliefs.
You need to do something to breaking the pattern of the limiting belief.
Questioning is the first step, but if you only do that, the possibilities of
moving to a more empowering perspective stay in your head. Some type of action
must be taken that puts your conclusions to the test. Just make sure that
you’re not staying in the limited head-space that leads you to reinforce what
you already hold to be true. Suspend your judgment and take some kind of action
to test your assumptions.
It might seem simple, but these
are the basic steps to moving past any limiting belief.
They’re only part of it,
though. In order to really integrate a new, more empowering belief, you’ll need to spend time cultivating it.
And it can help to go through a structured process to dissolve the limit.
So how can they can prevent us from
achieving the personal and professional success we deserve, so thinking about
breaking these kinds of beliefs, I wanted to share some ideas on how to go
about doing it. Some are concrete tactics while others are more
inspirational.
1.
Acknowledge It
Identify the limiting belief. Greet it. Let it know that you’re aware it exists.
Identify the limiting belief. Greet it. Let it know that you’re aware it exists.
2. Expose It
Don’t hide from it. Bring it out into the open.
Don’t hide from it. Bring it out into the open.
3. Advertise
It
Share this limiting belief with others. They’ll tell you how ridiculous you’re being when you can’t see it yourself.
Share this limiting belief with others. They’ll tell you how ridiculous you’re being when you can’t see it yourself.
4. Challenge
It
Ask “What evidence do I have that supports this belief?”
Ask “What evidence do I have that supports this belief?”
5. Risk It
What if this liming belief was actually true? So what?! Throw caution to the wind and you’ll discover that “failure” isn’t so bad.
What if this liming belief was actually true? So what?! Throw caution to the wind and you’ll discover that “failure” isn’t so bad.
6. Remember
Others Like It
What limiting beliefs have you overcome in the past?
What limiting beliefs have you overcome in the past?
7. Examine It
When did it start? Where did it come from?
When did it start? Where did it come from?
8. Pay
Attention To It
What is it preventing you from accomplishing?
What is it preventing you from accomplishing?
9. Take It To
Its Logical Conclusion
If you don’t get rid of this belief, what will happen?
If you don’t get rid of this belief, what will happen?
10. Get Mad
At It
This limiting belief is a jerk. Don’t make friends with him. Show him who’s boss.
This limiting belief is a jerk. Don’t make friends with him. Show him who’s boss.
11. Laugh At
It
Seriously? This limiting belief is hilarious! I can’t even keep a straight face when I think about it…
Seriously? This limiting belief is hilarious! I can’t even keep a straight face when I think about it…
12. Take
a Break From It
Put it on hold. Pretend it doesn’t exist for a while. What’s different?
Put it on hold. Pretend it doesn’t exist for a while. What’s different?
13.
Exaggerate It
Turn up the volume on it. How ridiculous does it look when it’s 20 feet tall?
Turn up the volume on it. How ridiculous does it look when it’s 20 feet tall?
14. Reverse
It
What would happen if the exact opposite was true?
What would happen if the exact opposite was true?
15. Repeat It
Ever repeat the same word or phrase so many times it stops making any sense? Do that.
Ever repeat the same word or phrase so many times it stops making any sense? Do that.
16.
Prioritize It
Make it an important priority to get over this limiting belief. Stop putting it off.
Make it an important priority to get over this limiting belief. Stop putting it off.
17. Lean Into
It
Sometimes pulling away from it only makes it stronger. When you stop resisting, it goes away.
Sometimes pulling away from it only makes it stronger. When you stop resisting, it goes away.
18. Replace
It
What UN-Limiting Belief can you put in its place?
What UN-Limiting Belief can you put in its place?
19. Starve It
What actions and thoughts feed this limiting belief? Get rid of those and watch it die.
What actions and thoughts feed this limiting belief? Get rid of those and watch it die.
20. Make It
Hurt
Try the old stand-by rubber band snap on the wrist every time you find yourself falling back on it.
Try the old stand-by rubber band snap on the wrist every time you find yourself falling back on it.
21. Listen To
It
What is this belief really telling you?
What is this belief really telling you?
22. Respect
It
Limiting beliefs shouldn’t be ignored or belittled. Underestimate it at your own peril.
Limiting beliefs shouldn’t be ignored or belittled. Underestimate it at your own peril.
23. Doubt It
Just because it feels real, doesn’t mean it IS real.
Just because it feels real, doesn’t mean it IS real.
24. Invest In
It
Put your time, money, and energy into overcoming it.
Put your time, money, and energy into overcoming it.
25. Imagine
Life Without It
What would you be capable of?
What would you be capable of?
26. Separate
It
Maybe this belief is attached to someone in your life and you’re just absorbing it. Is someone else feeding it to you?
Maybe this belief is attached to someone in your life and you’re just absorbing it. Is someone else feeding it to you?
27.
Disassociate It
Is there an action, situation or feeling that triggers this belief to pop up? Learn how to have one without the other.
Is there an action, situation or feeling that triggers this belief to pop up? Learn how to have one without the other.
28. Track It
Are there times when it doesn’t show up? What’s that all about?
Are there times when it doesn’t show up? What’s that all about?
29. Tilt It
Look at it differently. A new perspective may change it completely.
Look at it differently. A new perspective may change it completely.
30. Sacrifice
It
Yes, you may feel like it’s a part of you that you can’t imagine living without. Let it go. Sacrifice it to the Gods.
Yes, you may feel like it’s a part of you that you can’t imagine living without. Let it go. Sacrifice it to the Gods.
31. Reason
With It
Logically. Truthfully.
Logically. Truthfully.
32. Look for
Twins
Is one limiting belief showing up in multiple ways?
Is one limiting belief showing up in multiple ways?
33. Forgive
Yourself
Don’t hold it against yourself that you’ve been harboring this limiting belief. You’re human.
Don’t hold it against yourself that you’ve been harboring this limiting belief. You’re human.
34. Interrupt
It
When you notice a limiting belief rearing its ugly head, stop yourself mid-thought and…
When you notice a limiting belief rearing its ugly head, stop yourself mid-thought and…
35. Breathe
Into It
Inhale, exhale.
Inhale, exhale.
36. Confront
It
Look it in the eye.
Look it in the eye.
37. Verbalize
It
Say it out loud. How silly does it sound?
Say it out loud. How silly does it sound?
38. Write
About It
Put it on paper. How different does it look?
Put it on paper. How different does it look?
39. Simplify
It
At its fundamental core, what is this limiting belief about?
At its fundamental core, what is this limiting belief about?
40. Engage
With It
Start a conversation. Get to know it.
Start a conversation. Get to know it.
41. Connect
It
How is this limiting belief connected to your mental attitude?
How is this limiting belief connected to your mental attitude?
42. Align
Forces Against It
Prepare all of your faculties for battle.
Prepare all of your faculties for battle.
43. Reword It
If you phrase it in a different way, does it offer a different meaning?
If you phrase it in a different way, does it offer a different meaning?
44.
Compartmentalize It
Isolate it to one corner of your mind. Don’t let it infect other thoughts.
Isolate it to one corner of your mind. Don’t let it infect other thoughts.
45. Normalize
It
You’re not unique for having these beliefs. Everyone has them. It’s okay.
You’re not unique for having these beliefs. Everyone has them. It’s okay.
46. Reframe
It
It might feel like truth. But it’s not. It’s a perception. Reframe it as such.
It might feel like truth. But it’s not. It’s a perception. Reframe it as such.
47. Take
Responsibility For It
This limiting belief belongs to you. It’s yours to keep or discard. Make the choice.
This limiting belief belongs to you. It’s yours to keep or discard. Make the choice.
48.
Disconnect From It
This belief is not a part of who you are. It is not your identity. Losing it will only let your true identity shine more.
This belief is not a part of who you are. It is not your identity. Losing it will only let your true identity shine more.
49. Tune It
Out
Stop listening! Turn a deaf ear on it. Hit the “mute” button.
Stop listening! Turn a deaf ear on it. Hit the “mute” button.
50. Abandon
It
Leave it in a basket at the edge of the woods. A pack of wolves might adopt it and raise it to be one of their own.
Leave it in a basket at the edge of the woods. A pack of wolves might adopt it and raise it to be one of their own.
51.
Take Action On It
Nothing will change without your active participation. What are you doing TODAY to overcome this limiting belief?
Nothing will change without your active participation. What are you doing TODAY to overcome this limiting belief?
www.steviekidd.co.uk